I Cannot Cheat

For 18 years I have been taught that cheaters never win. It doesn’t matter if you’re playing euchre or even a friendly game of croquet. Cheating is not an option.
However, last weekend I felt a change in the winds. My friends and I were headed down to Daytonia (Day-tone-ya) and on the way we stopped by Knoxville to visit Stephen’s family. After eating some pretty darn good bar-b-q, the family decided to break out Phase 10. Since I am a Whitaker, and cannot pass up a game of cards, I immediately jump in on the action. This is when I find out that my boyfriend is an avid cheater, much like those fellows down in Corbin, who sticks Wild Cards down his socks. After somehow getting his phase every hand, the family realizes his dirty plot, and he is forced to return to Phase One. I, of course, was shocked with all of the shenanigans going around. Therefore, the next hand I only did what any normal person would do. I was working on a run of nine and all I needed was a five. I looked down at the cards Stephen had already played, and there was a five just screaming “take me, take me.” I slyly reach down and pick up the card, unnoticed. I thought I was home free until I heard “Stephen! What did you do with that five!” Instantly, the entire room turned on Stephen and was threatening to kick him out. I was nearly rolling on the ground with laughter. The look on his face was priceless. I finally admitted that it was I who stole the five, and the room was stunned. I was forced to go back to phase one and now I cannot be in a conversation without a cheating joke thrown in somewhere in the mix. In fact, there are jokes being said that this very moment. I must say that cheaters do finish last, and it is not just a worn out saying. I will never cheat again in my life. Well, until next time at least.